Thursday, July 23, 2015

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Year of Change

It's been a long time since I last visited this place.
Anyway, I came to realise that no matter how busy I am, I would usually blog at the start of a new year.
Sustaining this throughout the year, though, is another thing altogether.

I guess I would aim for one entry per month though, to reflect on certain aspects of my life and certain happenings. Another driver would be to keep my writing standards from dropping.
Undoubtedly in work, I do utilize my writing skills, by sending out plenty of emails and doing up a few presentations here and there, but that's definitely very different from what I have enjoyed doing during English lessons back in the school days.

I guess I am pretty much someone who is motivated by the fruits that comes from my own labour. By that, I don't mean results per se. Sure, I have enjoyed Math because it was really satisfying when I managed to get the correct answer. I preferred free writing as opposed to comprehension (which had definite answers), especially when I thought of a phrase or a sentence that is very apt to express my idea or analogy.

After stepping into the working world for 3+ years, the fact that one wouldn't get as much free play in work compared to when in school had settled in my mind. The rules of the game has certainly increase, and what makes it much worse are the unspoken rules. I am very much fortunate that thus far I have not severely offended people or become victimized, despite my blur and slow nature.

Many said it before, the only constant is change. There are many types of changes, whether it is anticipated or unxpected, foreseen or unforeseen. The Year of Change, as titled, suggested that I foresee upcoming changes due to the unexpected leaving of my boss.
Even though sometimes I do have my reserves about my boss's decisions, things almost always ended with a happy ending, mainly due to her experience, which honed her foresight.
It is definitely a loss, yet signifies a change as well.
Totally unrelated, but my job scope for 2+ years is changing in this year as well.
If this hadn't change, I would be more at ease despite the change of boss, as she had provided me ample guidance in my current role.
Now, it's as if walking into that darkness again, without any light or beacon.


Friday, June 20, 2014

Aspirations

Came across an interesting article today which provided food for thought, it is in Chinese, roughly translated as: if pay is disregarded, what would you choose to work as?

Reading the title instantly led me to recall my childhood aspirations, however with deeper thoughts, I realize it is not really about that, but more of your preferences as a working adult, assuming money is a limitless resource.
Since young, we've been consumed by this idea that the main purpose of working is to make money.
Our parents work to bring the bacon home, as well as to buy us the latest toys.
It is no wonder that many young aspirations are lawyers, doctors, actors, and the like.
Imagine you trying to tell your primary school classmate that you aspire to be a bus driver ( due to some obsession with automobiles) or an artist ( because you love to draw), what reaction will you get?
No offense here, but even at a young age, we know which jobs brings the most money and/or most prestige.

"If pay is disregarded, what would you choose to work as?" naturally should be the question fresh graduates or young working adults should ask themselves.
Having experience or having heard of experiences of various jobs, one would be in a better position to gauge their own likes or dislikes in a job, as well as their inclinations towards certain things or the absence of it.

Many people complained everyday about their jobs, yet most do nothing about it, because of? Money? Prestige? Bound by financial commitments? Inertia to change?
Some report must have been done on this and I am curious what's the top Pareto.

If I were one of the surveyed, I will be torn between the first and the last option. Much as I hate to admit, the real reason would be the inertia to change. However, on first thought, I will probably put money as the answer as my preferred job would definitely pay lower than the current. I wonder if I belong to the majority or minority.





Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Uninspired

Recently, frustrations towards people and things have cluttered up my mind. The daily affairs have again bogged down my mind, totally uninspiring. It seems as if the only aim for today is just to get to tomorrow. 
2013 was the year when it all started. 2014 it started to worsen.
Micro-managing, that is.
It seems like chasing after people for deadlines and highlighting other people's issues is even more valued than performing the actual work itself.
Ignorance, I found out, is a double edged sword, it works well on most occasions and yet can cut you back the wrong way on rarer occasions. 
Thinking about this has already sapped away my energy. 
It's tiring to face challenging tasks, and yet even more exhausting to face challenging people.
It's no wonder I have been feeling worn out. Every morning, it is a struggle to wake up, despite a good seven hours of uninterrupted sleep. My brain tells me that I am void of energy every time the alarm or snooze comes on.

Out of desperation, I have gotten myself some self-help books.
Hopefully, I can gain some inspiration, as well as some help on time management to tackle the challenging "things" in order to overcome the challenging "people".


Tuesday, March 04, 2014

Willpower, where have you gone to?

It feels as though I am slipping away from the rest of the humanity.
The invisible wall seems more well-guarded than usual.
There is so much grudges and disgust towards some that I have to will myself to let it go.
No matter how good one's temper appeared to be, it is never proven until one's tolerance limits is tested.

Desperately needing to find the centre of my life back and not be swayed by unworthy events/people.
:(


Monday, February 17, 2014

looking forward

Considering that it is now mid-feb, It seems late to start a post about 2014.
But being a person with little conscious for time, it just felt like the right time to write about it.
After all, the beauty about humans being different individuals is that we all have different background, experiences, ideas, opinions, and even the sense of time.
Some people might feel having been one and a half months into the year, they have already planned out what they wanted to do in this year, and perhaps, have completed one or two things in their bucket list.

I am glad that for most people whom I know, the start of the new year is a rather slow period, mainly on enjoying the festives, setting goals & resolutions for the next 12 months ahead.
For the past few years at least, it wasn't the same for me.
From as far back as I can remember, 2010 till this year, the start of the new year had always present itself with lots of changes, challenges and disparaging facts to grapple with.
For the past few years, December has more or less been a good month, with the nice feeling hangover to the turn of year.
Then, mid/end January has always been the start of all troubles.
Needless to say, for the past few years,  I have not fully experience the festive mood of the CNY.

Anticipating the work trip in January, I thought this year would be different, however it did not seem so. The work trip overall was great, but being just a week before CNY, I did not participate in the usual CNY preparations as I would in the past years. Therefore it seemed a little strange to be back with all the new year goodies arranged neatly and all the boisterous red deco out to welcome visitors.
The jetlag wasn't the worse, it was about being lagging in absorbing the CNY festive mood.

Then came the bulk of my troubles.
Returning to work on CNY saw tons of issues happened during the holidays and happening right then. Those drained my energy totally and I fervently hope that all these will never happen again

I have indeed become more cautious about the early months of the year, as each year, something different and drastic happens and making me lose faith in the meaning of a 'Happy' new year.
On the other hand, the year is still long and unpredictable ahead, perhaps and hopefully the followings months will be more smooth-sailing.

It is now mid-Feb, I finally had time to put things into my bucket list for the new year.

1. Find back my faith! Everything that happens has a meaning.
2. Travel! Each journey has its own meaning. You will not know it until you start the first step.
3. Work! Think clearly, filter out the noise, focus on the right things & strive towards improvement
4. Show more concern and help to people around me. They exist for a purpose. Cherish them.
5. Do more of what makes me happy. Eat, play, jog, blog.
6. Work slowly but steadily towards the ultimate goal. Slow and steady towards fulfilling the vision that is in my mind.


Wednesday, November 27, 2013

终于体会真心与假意的差别。
诚意回报真心、虚伪应对假意、
再贴切不过了。