//cloudy gloom//

Just as I thought CA week was over, this week brings another 3 tests in all.
management on monday, maths today and physics tomorrow.
Ya. The physics re-test.
Weird timing: 7-9pm.
I wish I could have started everything earlier.
Like studying for physics test and formal lab report.
Becuz I've suddenly lost my motivation to do anything.
Even blogging.
My lecturer, Dr Ko, said before that if you lost the interest in doing something that was once pleasurable, it is most likely that you suffer from depression.
I think I'm mildly depressed.

The slacking bug recently invaded my life.
I mean, sure, I had to give extra tuition to my tutees due to their exams and to do a draft for management report.
But I know those are just EXCUSES.
Truth is, I've slacked.
I can only prepare for the worst tomorrow.
Haiz.
Anyway, I still don't know what I got for the nightmarish physics CA the previous time.
Since some people e-mailed the prof to ask about their marks, I thought I should ask about it too.
To know how bad I flunked it.
Maybe it was the tone of my e-mail or maybe he wasn't in a good mood.
The prof refuses to tell me my marks!!
Argh. What is this?
I emailed him yesterday 10+pm
My friend did it at around 12am.
Yet the replies were different!
The reply I got: Sorry I can't possibly check for everyone.
The reply my friend got: XX/100
You see, it's SO unfair!
My thoughts were that if I know my horrendous marks, I would have the motivation to study for the re-test.
Surely he doesn't have the right to withhold my marks from me but tell others what they got!
Argh. I'm so angry.
I absolutely hate discrimination.
Fine, I will NOT e-mail him again.

By the way, my studies is in a total mess right now.
I kept lagging.. and there's no end to it.
I simply don't have the discipline to keep away from the TV.
Plus, I don't have the mood to study.
In other words, I have low intrinsic motivation.
Low stress + low pressure + bad time management ----> low productivity----> low quality and quantity of work
I remembered Mr Chio told me in J1 that I need to find a study method that works for me.
It has been almost 3 years and I haven't found it yet.
Why??

Also, I sort of find myself travelling for 1/2 of the day.
I am tired of travelling to and fro.
Absolutely tired.
What makes it worse is that I am tired but I can't sleep properly on the bus or mrt.
Even taking afternoon naps at home is impossible.
The only time I can sleep is during lectures and at night at home.
The drone of the lecurers' voices, esp physics and life science, provides the sleep-inducing effect.
The silence of the night makes me sleep easily too.
But I should not be sleeping during lectures!
Can anyone provide me with a remedy for my problems?

That's all.
I need to force myself to study for physics now.
Haiz.

//in the sweltering heat//

The weather today was hot!
I drank lots of plain water, ate an ice-cream cone, had a cup of bandung and strawberry milk tea!
Yesterday was the first day bus service 179A was in use.
It travels the same route as 179, just that it doesn't stop at any bus-stops except those at NTU itself.
I shouldn't have taken it on the first day itself cuz just like computer softwares and tech devices like MP3, the first version surely contain problems and the subsequent ones would be ok.
I guess it's SBS's strategy of not making the berth too crowded hence both 179 and 179A are currently in different waiting berths.
Anyway, I forgot the new service started on mon.
Becuz there were so many bus queues in the morning so I sort of found myself on way to the berth of 179A.
The first day saw 179A rendered useless becuz the frequency of 179 itself was even faster.
Hmm. like while I was patiently waiting for 179A, three 179 buses had gone off.
oh well.
a lesson learnt.

Returning to sch on the first day, as usual, was a blue monday.
Well, except that I got to wear lab coat for the lab lesson.
And goggles and mask. Cool!
Two major things coming up.
Formal lab report and motivation report drafts, on top of tutorials.
Oh ya, another thing, our phy lecturer thought that some people, like me, screwed up their CA1 so there's gonna be a voluntary make-up test NEXT FRI. (I haven't got back my paper but i'm totally sure the results would be horrendous)
Shocking! Not much time left to prepare.

I remember telling some people some time ago that uni life is slack.
Now I shall take back my words.

//windy//

yes. something is bothering me.
at home.
occasionally.
like a minor tear in the fabric.
though minor, once a little more force is supplied,
the fabric will be extremely easy to be torn into two.
tearing like nobody else's business.

On the surface it seems like everything was perfectly alright.
Except for the occasional arguments
Truthfully, it is a crack that will never mend.

You have never trusted me to make my own decisions.
You have always compared me to people better than me.
You have never been happy with everything that I do.
You have always thought that I was cowardy.
Sometimes, you make me have doubts even about myself.
You have stolen my self-esteem, stomped on my pride and shattered my self-confidence.

//clouded//

Happiness is temporal.
Humans are always spiralling in the circle of happy and unhappy.

I have never done anything to make you proud. Everything to make you angry.

//sunny//

simply adore this kind of weather today =D

Finally! I was able to wake up for my morning jog today.
What can I say? Simply rejuvinating!
To be able to exercise one's limbs.
I don't want to become a "psycho motor moron" anyway...

I met up with meiting and wei qi! yea.
Sometimes, people sigh and lament that many things can't withstand time, I'm so glad that our friendship could withstand years.

Anyway, thanks to weiqi, I realised that i'm green-yellow!
not literally but according to this book she borrowed from the library, personality types can be divided into different colours.
I did the questionaire and then read the descriptions for green people.
Points that I could remember:
-peace lover who will avoid conflicts at all times
-imaginative, sometimes even distort facts to support what we want to say (er-hem, i'm guilty!)
-motivational writers (note: "writer", not "speaker", the reason illustrated in the next point)
-leaves spoken sentences hanging halfway but expect others to understand the latter half of the sentence( ok this leaves me laughing all the way becuz it's way too true!)
-loves inspiration (everyone does also, right?)

I'm also quite the "yellow"personality.
I think, most likely becuz I make my decisions based on logic and rational thinking, rather than by intuition. "Greens" are people who trust their intuition alot.

Anyway, we went to Subway and visited shops in amk hub and central.
yes. again! I just went to the place just 2 days ago!
Hearty Italian bread with Italian BMT tastes so good!
This time round I managed to ward off all the temptations of buying anything for myself.
Afterall, I've spent a fair amount in the past two days.
Retail therapy after the stressful CAs ain't going to be cheap.
I got some stuff to coax my tutees instead.
It's got to be Children's Day soon. OCTOBER 1ST, as my tutees have kindly reminded me.
oh please, I will NOT forget Children's Day, or any other holiday, for that matter.
Even though it doesn't concern me.
Holidays just cheers people up =)

//tues//
Yesterday was another busy day as well.
Project meeting with kun wu and ming ming.
we're supposed to write the intro for our project.
so after all the discussion, there's finally some headway to it.
I finally see the struture of our report.
Finally know what the others are doing and what we'll be doing.
I think my head was quite dense during the past few meetings as the ideas the other members gave did not ring a bell nor get into my head.
However, the downside was that i had to travel all the way to ntu for the meeting! argh.
Actually there was supposed to be meeting tomorrow but the group leader did not inform anything yet. Yet.
Sorry, but I do not subscribe to last minute decisions.
So nothing heard from anyone means no meeting.
Hence I hereby declare tomorrow is mugging day!
Which comes at the right time bcuz I have not touch any stuff that I'm supposed to be studying... since last friday =X

//slack- infected with the lazy bug!//

Recently I just felt like sleeping.
Even though I did not do anything much that would take up much energy.
But 10 hours of sleep just isn't enough.
I wake up feeling sleepy all over again.
If it wasn't the fact that I'm meeting my friends, I wouldn't force myself to stay awake.
Strangely, when i forced myself to keep awake, the sleepy bug didn't bother me again.

Anyway, today I went for movies and shopping at Amk hub. More importantly, the early celebration of bel's birthday=)

me, bel, lyn

On board 86, the bus went passed aj and that feeling of nostalgia overwhelmed me.

Even more so during my return journey, when I saw Mdm Jean Lee lugging her seemingly heavy bag, wearing the same white-and-blue striped shirt and a jean skirt.

It was as if time has rewinded itself.

Although sometimes I really did not enjoy my two years there, I was still reminscing about the past.

I couldn't take my eyes of block 11, where i spent alot of time in-between lessons at the corridor looking down at the mini fountain, lost in my thoughts, until the next tutor came in.

It seemed like yesterday when I was standing at the corridor, looking at the buses passing by, hoping I could be one of the passengers, away from this place which was slowly sapping away my energy and happiness.

Anyway, back to the movie.

I had no idea why christabel chose to watch "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry".

Afterall it's rated M18, containing homosexual theme.

But then again, she did not know this beforehand.

Usually I steer clear of M18 unless...you know...there's violence and gore.

Like war movies?

Lol. I guess I'm sadist but I just want to know what causes people to kill each other.

But recently, there's nothing much to watch anyway, just some average shows...

The truth is, I was not disappointed by the movie.

In fact, it is quite inspiring!

Synopse:

Two great friends Larry and Chuck are both firemen. This is despite the fact that both live different lifestyles. Larry- an overweight middle-aged man, a doting father, who doesn't know how to cook. Chuck- a good-looking flirtatious playboy. Repeated times of saving fire has made Larry realise he may just die anytime. Larry's wife died and he found out that in order for him to change his govt fund beneficiary from his wife to his children, he has to marry a new wife or get a domestic partner (otherwise know as gay) There was once during their fire-saving task when Chuck was saved by Larry. Chuck swore to repay Larry for his favour. Thus Larry's trust in Chuck made him propose to Chuck to pretend to be his domestic partner.

The hilarious part was when govt officers came to check up on their relationship and the duo tried means and ways to convince him they are genuinely gay. (no obscene acts though)

Then they went to consult this gorgeous female lawyer whom Chuck was attracted to.

Deep as their friendship was, Chuck refused to admit his attraction to the lawyer so as to not expose the scam they were in.

In fact, Chuck babysat Larry's kids whenever the latter was on duty.

Larry's son proved to be a disappointment to Larry becuz he preferred to take part in his sch's musical than watched a baseball match. In fact, Larry's son could sing, tap-dance and even do a split! He was very much feminine, hence Larry kept forcing him to do the opposite.

Meanwhile, once their gay relationship was found out by the rest at the fire station, their colleagues all shunned them except for a ferocious-looking guy who was truly grateful that he could now face the fact that he himself, is a homosexual.

These reminded me of the fact that whatever we do, we should face ourselves truthfully and not pretend to be someone that we're not. be true. be yourself.

Also, the film highlighted that in American, there's still vocal anti-gay activists while Canada is recognising gay marriages.

Through this unusual experience of being a "gay", Chuck realises that people should not discriminate against homosexuals.

What's the difference between straight and gay?

As Chuck puts it, "Nothing, we're all humans".

//back-2-sch friday//






When I first received my timetable, I was glad they planned a 4-day week for this semester.
Ok. Except for week 7& 13.
Hence, I realised that for these two weeks, it's actually exam week.
So fri I had life sci CA.
It's kind of weird why we need to study life sci, they only included it since 2004, I think. Anyway, I was quite stressed over it cuz I had no bio background and there was no tutorial conducted for this subject.
I don't know why I was so stressed when the CAs were approaching.
After all, two of them were MCQ questions, only physics was strutured qns.
Previously, I would not even think much of MCQ tests.
After all, you can rely on your gut feeling if you do not know the answer.
Not that my intuition is esp accurate.
Sometimes, the options can help to jot my memory, I guess.
Many a times, I tend to get mind blocks/blanks when I get intimidated by strutured/essay qns...like in physics.
I'm so scared of the results! ar! but i heard the weightage of this test will be reduced to 30%-?. Ok, I managed to clear materials sci and life sci. phew. I mean, I don't intend to aim for full marks or what. Average marks will suffice.
Perhaps I should stop this depressing thoughts about exams.

It's officially a recess week! yea!
Actually, the holidays began right after the life sci CA.
After breakfast, it was off to SRC for basketball.
omg! i have never ever ever ever played bball!
Unless u count the insignificant no. of times during PE lessons.
not jc. maybe sec and pri sch.
We actually booked badminton courts but it was too early.
Furthermore, we had no bball but on the way, my frens they saw their frens going to the SRC as well so we sort of divided ourselves and play with them.
To add on to my humiliation, did I mention I was once called "psycho-motor moron"
To be exact, my sec 4 class girls were called that by my PE teacher.
I recently saw this term some where again. forgot where.
But it means that we are like "trees".
inflexible and slow.
ah whatever.
Yiwen was so enthu about it, I had no choice but to join in too.
Imagine...a noob at bball playing with a sporty girl and a group of pro guys that I dunno.
I guess those reading will feel sad for me.
But, I was quite impressed with some of the shots they put in.
Ok, tyco, I managed to shoot in a few goals as well (erm..is "goal" a correct term? I do read about soccer but know nuts about bball)
that is provided no one blocked me or snatch the ball at that point in time.
I didn't have the "feel" for bball la. seriously.
Among the guys, it was quite rough lo. i mean, in my opinion only.
One got scratched by another's fingernail, leaving a long, red, painful line along his arm.
Yw got a nasty blister on her feet. with blood too. ouch!

Anyway, I was glad when the game ended.
Thankfully.
I'll rather stick to jogging and badminton.
Badminton was on the list next. Waited for the rackets and wx's expensive yonex shuttlecock.
My hand was quite sore from the dribbling practice and shooting so I had no stength and conc. at all.
Couldn't even return easy serves! so yb and wx gave me some advice.
Rested for a while...I watched eunice, li qing, wei xiang and yuan bin played...while chatting with yiwen.
Then, eunice and lq wanted to go home, bathe and then shop at jurong.
The rest of us played a while then hui jun came after her jap class.
Time passed quickly...and we bathe at the nice SRC bathrooms.
Feeling extremely famished, we packed dinner at watch tv at the corridor of hall 1.
Finally! we- me, yw, hj, eunice, wx, lq went to yunnan garden for the mooncake festival celebrations! It was organised by the Chinese society.
There were games like catching fish (real guppies!), caricature drawings, fortune-telling, word games.
But I think their motive was to make money.
So many stalls selling food, drinks and stuff but we did not succumbed to temptation.
Just got the free lanterns, watch peformances, then went on a burning spree!
No. we did not manage to burn ntu la. Haha.
Just paper lanterns, sticks and dried leaves.
We set up a mini-mini campfire with the help of candles placed on the side of pavement and used the burnt sticks to scribble on the ground.
Then, a funny thing happened.
Everyone was staring at this girl who was staring at us first.
Actually she was smiling.
She went near our circle then stepped back, shaking her head when we threw her puzzling looks. Initially I thought one of my frens knew her but they were equally stunned by her.
Our thoughts were the same: Is she trying to tell us not to burn things and be eco-friendly?
We froze, waiting for her to say something.
Finally, in the midst of the tension, she opened her mouth, "Are you all doing fortune-telling?"
We shook our heads and I was desperately trying to suppress my laughter.
We all cracked up soon after she was gone with her group of friends.
Did we (forming a circle around the mini-mini campfire and lighted candle) looked like we are telling fortunes?
lol. she must be a foreigner who have never seen kids burning twigs and leaves on mid-autumn festival.
Then, we went back.
They were waiting for hj from her jc outing, yb fr dance lesson, jh fr modelling shots to have their sleepover. I did not stay cuz the next day i had to teach tuition at 11am.
On the way home, I was quite surprised that bus 179 is still full of ntu students even at such a late hour.

I'm looking forward to the break! Outings, project meetings and MOST importantly, to catch on my work. esp PHYSICS. argh!

//drowning in the sea of knowledge//

This week is CA week. Horrendous week.
I could have predicted it though it's only monday.
Oh man. I was utterly demoralised after Physics today.
Not that the questions are particularly difficult.
Just that i'm too lousy.
should have revised before sch reopens.
Then i wouldn't have been lamenting about the lecturer's monstrous pace.
Then i wouldn't have lag.
This time round, it's confirm fail.
i mean, failed.
Then again, I would be surprised if i had gotten any mark at all.
30% of total burnt!
burn away my brain too.

Tomorrow: Materials Sci - hope for a pass
Friday: Life Science - completely disillusioned

//Earthquake//

Yesterday was the first time I experience tremors.
I was leaning against the wall and eating my dinner when suddenly I felt my head spinning.
I thought I was too tired. Then, I realised actually it was the wall moving.
Haha. A lot of people went down to the grass patch below my block.
Surprisingly, the construction of the new "Minds" school near my home went uninterrupted.
I admire their professionalism!
When the wall was rocking, I never felt so vulnerable before.
Should the block tumble, all of us will perish.
No wonder my late grandfather once said that LKY is smart.
You see, even though Singapore has so much reclaimed land and has built so many flats, nothing threatening ever happen even when neighbouring countries experience earthquake.
Man, I feel so fortunate.

//Ratatouille- "Anyone can cook! "//

A hilarious film! Depicts an unusual relationship between human and rat. The next time I see a rat, I 'll probably be kinder.

I especially like Skinner's grumpy LOOK.

Yesterday was outing day! Went to PS and the Cathay to celebrate the two "kids" birthday =D

Surprise surprise! Bluff them to wear blue and in the end the rest of us turned up in black! A conspiracy =P

yum! gelare ice-cream cake!

xiao jun and xiao bai. the 2 birthday kids. 2 comical characters =P

everyone says cheese!

//bolted out of the house @640am//
//returned @ 855pm//

It's a LONG, BLUE monday every week
SO far, I've fulfil my resolution of NOT succumbing to sleep during lectures.
So far so good. But it looks like a lot of people are sleeping in lectures! lol
Physics is still difficult to understand, though it is better now.
What to do? with such lecturer and tutor. everyone is complaining too.
His famous quote

The lecture notes are only for your visual consumption, if you only study
that, you will fail!

Not a threat, it's the reality...

Barely an hour after Dr Ko's lecture on stress management...

Me: you live in yck ar? that's quite far...why never stay in hall?
Esther: oh i dread coming to sch...don't you think so? imagine...if I live in sch, I'll have the tendency to skip all the lectures and lock myself up in the room. displaying social withdrawal symptoms... and become depressed.
Me: ok, next, you'll become sucidal.
Esther: I'll probably climb to the highest level of ntu and jump.
Me: actually the highest level in ntu is level 1. but there is a possiblity of successful attempt cuz the basement levels are actually open to the air and not underground.
Esther: At least if i get to go home everyday, there's something to look forward to.
Me: ya. when we are going home, stress levels probably are low. then, the next day. on the way to sch, our stress level just skyrocket.

FACT: Women are more prone to depression and suicidal thoughts, but men are more successful in sucidal attempts because they uses more violent methods of committing suicide.

ok that pretty much sums up what we have learnt in the lecture.

//scorching hot //

Can't believe it. Time passed so quickly and gulp...the CAs are coming!
Busy, busy, busy.
Busy with tuition, busy with celebrating birthdays, busy with religion.
There just isn't enough time for studying!

月牙灣- FIR
当晚天空的沙砾
带着我们的记忆
我从半路看回去
这秦关漫漫好弯曲
梦想穿过了西域
包含了多少的巉峄
爱情像一本游记
我会找寻它的谜语
看月牙湾下的泪光
在丝路之上被遗忘
是谁的心哪
孤单地留下
他还好吗
我多想爱他
那永恒的泪
凝固那一句话
也许可能蒸发
是谁的爱啊
比泪水坚强
轻声呼唤
就让我融化
每一滴雨水
演化成我翅膀
向着我爱的人追吧

//who are you? really...//

Be True Be Yourself

Sometimes, I wonder who am I. And why i'm not someone else. How would it feel if I'm someone else?

Perhaps all of us start from nothing at all. Then our actions determine our own paths. Or is it that everything was already arranged for us? Where we go...who we meet. Most of the time I believe that our actions determine our paths...this contradicts "be yourself". After all, who we are is determined by our values, experience and environment.

Haha. Maybe there's no point pondering on this. Since I have supposedly more important things to do.

Since school started, I think it's time to make some resolutions.

1. Try not to sleep during lectures (Stay Alert!)

2. Try to do all tutorials beforehand (Work Hard!)

3. Blog more often (Relax!)

4. Plan and manage time carefully

5. Jog more often

a hole in a bus door- cold air leaks

//rain rain go away//

Whether you are a prince or a pauper, the amount of time you are given in a day
is the same.

-something enlightening=)

Things that need to be done:
-3 Personal Learning Journals
-Maths tut
-Physics tut
-Read up on life science

You Are a Realist

You don't see the glass as half empty or half full. You see what's exactly in the glass. You never try to make a bad situation seem better than it is... But you also never sabotage any good things you have going on. You are brutally honest in your assessments of situations - and this always seems to help you cope.

Are You An Optimist or Pessimist?

// after a month //

Time passes quickly...it has been 4 weeks since sch started.
Today was quite evenful.
Firstly, I left my hp at the library in the morning but didn't know it until like 4 pm when I was supposed to meet my management project members.
Surprisingly, when I realised that my hp wasn't in my bag as I had thought, I remained quite calm.
Usually when something so important gets missing, I'll panicked...my brain turns cold and go haywire, imagining all the worst-case scenarios.
Always, my first instinct is to turn to my mum for help.
But today, I don't know how it happened but i actually knew how to react.
Of course, to call my phone.
I'm EXtremely grateful to the kind-hearted soul who returned me my phone.
Though I had to rush to City Hall to meet him after the meeting.
By the way, I didn't even know that I lost it in the library.
It was the person who told me.
Argh! since when had I become so muddle-headed?
Anyway, a million thanks to the person.
Can't imagine how grateful I was.
On the MRT all the way from Boon lay to City Hall, suddenly I kept noticing people using their phones.
And I counldn't help feeling lost without mine.
It just goes to how deep technology has penetrated in our lives.

After I went to City Hall to get my hp, I saw wq's msg saying there's a comex fair at suntec.
Since I'm already in that area, might as well take a look lo.
Maybe it was the first day, so the place wasn't very packed...luckily!
Hmm..but I still can't make up my mind if I should get a notebook.

By the way, I wanted to read my Maths notes on the way to school but met wq instead!
haha so lucky! =D haha come ntu la.
the mrt trip seems much shorter when you are chatting!
And, the "high" people in the same course as me was so funny! we actually climbed to the top of the "golf course" aka art&media design library.
I couldn't believe how cool the place was.
An aesthetically pleasing facade with a laid-back ambience.
yea that is it!
I think Lib2 and Lee Wee Nam library are built for serious mugging while the arts library is for enjoyment and slacking. man. to make the place even better, they could even open a cafe!

Anyway, back to the meeting, attendance was 4/10.
Luckily I wasn't the leader or i'll stress.
Our leader is quite good at planning and organising! hmm. not bad!
We used the "open number" method to choose her de. haha.
She designed different roles for us to choose and guess what?
I chose to be one of the editors! haha.
By the way, the result that we have to produce is a written report.
Nothing much was discussed la...

//Life at NTU//

Finally my com is back!
Just the right time... when there are so many administrative and academic stuff to settle!
All those things are so confusing so I've decided to just keep whatever timetable they assigned me for this semester. Whether you can change your timetable, your subjects, or take extra electives really depends on how fast your fingers are, as everything is done online. However, since they opened the system to seniors first, freshmen are at a disadvantage. Which means to say we only have leftover vacancies to choose from.
A lot of things you gotta figure it yourself...erm since I didn't have a very analytical brain, I ended up in the wrong laboratory for my lab lesson.
Ok..so in the end I was late by 15 mins by the time I figured out that the laboratory I was supposed to go was at the other end of the school. (yes, weiqi, that's when you saw me looking flustered)
The campus map I had wasn't useful at all because I was bad at directions. Lol.
A strange thing about NTU is how they name their levels.
The highest level you can find in NTU is level 1. Before I got to know this, I was super shocked to know that my laboratory was at basement 6. And I also got to experience their lifts as two lifts on the same block may not get you to the same floor. For instance, I was already inside the lift when I realized the lift only travel between L1 and B3.
The first lab lesson I had was ok except for the fact that the class was so quiet.
Actually, when I first stepped into the lab, the whole place was dark with only 2 OHP lights shining. Then I realized that there was 2 lab groups in the lab. Everything had began without me as I was the last to enter. The lesson was alright except for the fact that the prof seems to be scared that I will accidentally cause a short circuit or even an explosion- do I look the type? Since the experiment was on diffraction grating, each time I tried to on a light source, the prof will go "eh eh….wait wait…what are you doing?"
Then after the experiment I watched a safety video which said that you have to consult the prof before switching on anything in the lab. Oh. How stringent.

For the second week we had the ECA carnival and IT fair. I couldn't believe it that they held the ECA carnival on the two narrow side walkways. Everyone was squashed together. Anyway, it was at the "throw your aeroplane" library booth that I won a thumbdrive! It is only 256mb but I was lucky, nonetheless. The atmosphere didn"t tempted me to join any ECA nor buy any laptop at all. All I saw was half-hearted attempts in introducing their ECA. The laptop fair only had a limited range of laptops priced above $2k which is not within my budget.

Although I'm still studying Maths, Physics…etc, one main difference from JCs is that there are more lectures than tutorials. For life science, I totally had no idea what is it about as the lecturer kept going on and on about Charles Darwin and revolution theories.
For a supposedly-familiar subject like maths, the tutorial questions were quite unexpected so it seems that the lecture notes were too brief and there's a lot to read up on. It doesn't help that I travel 2 hours to school and 2 hours back home everyday. Which brings me to another fact that the queue for bus 179 from boon lay mrt to ntu every morning is utterly horrendous.
So I was so happy last thursday when I finally arrive early to school, breaking my record of being late for more than a week.

// Do we have a choice? //

As one walks around the shopping malls in Singapore, one realizes that choices are stifling. Just like the nondescript HDB flats that fills up this island-nation, shopping malls are literally popping up everywhere, so much so that accompanying each MRT station, almost instinctively, one can smell a shopping mall.
This is definitely not exaggerating as bakeries such as “BreadTalk”, “Prima Deli”, “Four leaves” or “Delifrance” are always situated near the entrance of the mall. Delve further in, and without even opening one’s eyes, any self-respecting Singaporean can rant out to you which will be the shops inside: Giordano, Bossini, Bata, Watson’s, Metro, John Little, Kiddy Palace, Popular, Mini Toons, Kopitiam, Courts, Best Denki, Comics connection, TS, Sembawang, M1, Singtel, Mac, KFC, Pizza Hut, Timezone, Ya Kun, Mos, Yoshinoya…etc.
Want high-end stuff? Orchard Road is the best answer.
Want a different shopping experience? Try Bugis St, Holland V, Chinatown or even Little India.
Unlike other countries that offer much more entertainment choices, it is truly pathetic to see hordes of Singaporeans spending their precious weekends at those ubiquitous shopping malls.
If Singaporeans like we can’t even tell the difference between your East Point from West Mall, your Causeway Point from Compass Point, or even VivoCity from Marina Square, how can anyone claim that Singapore is a shopping paradise?
Truthfully, Singapore has the potential to be one. But, surely, something has to be done.

// A consumer-centered world //

Recent events made me realise that the world is REALLY becoming more consumer-centered. Contrary to popular belief “Consumer is King”, more and more consumers are falling into the trap of the commercial world. Is it because consumers are make out to be easy preys?
Going by the rising complaints received by CASE, I believe it to be so. There are in fact many other unreported cases, which I think, are unreported due to the fear of “losing face” or simply because many people have accepted this as a way of life.
Sometimes, I seriously think that people in the same industry has impeccable camaraderie, despite the fact that the job they do may be vastly different. That is how two or more companies can work together hand-in-hand to squeeze money out of consumers.
To beat the GST hike, a month ago, my parents decided to buy a new refrigerator. Most of the time, I just roll my eyes when the sales people address all males buyer-to-be as “boss” in Chinese and all females buyer-to-be as “miss” in Chinese.
No offense to the salespeople, after all they are simply doing their job to promote the stuff and most of them do not even have a good idea of how reliable the stuff is. So you can’t blame them when your newly-bought appliance spoils.
Well, it just so happened that ice formed in our new refrigerator…in the wrong place.
Ice miraculously formed in the bottom tier of our three-tiered giant, resulting the need for vegetables to be thawed before cooking.
Luckily, the warranty was still available so a maintenance man was called in.
Now, the middle-aged male owners are known as “uncles” while middle-aged females are known as “aunties”. If you run out of luck and encounter an inexperienced person, just brace yourself for the worst. Most likely, he will check your appliance and maintains that nothing is wrong with it. It is no big deal having ice forming on your veggies…plus, many people trust the brand, says the repairman.

I still remember, some time ago, there was this “Go the Extra Mile for Service”.
Oh please. Most people do not even budge an inch, let alone a mile!
Rather than focusing on better service, I think honesty will do.
How many consumers have fallen into the trap of “failing to read the miniscule printed words hidden at the extreme bottom of advertisements” and hence needing to pay than what the ad was supposed to offer?
How many letters proclaiming, “You have won a prize”, were received by people who have never purchased anything from the sender?
How many times have consumers been “coerced” by retailers to buy extra accessories for their gadgets that were supposedly to have “__% discount”?
The truth is, consumers have been exploited unknowingly by retailers.

// nothing goes right //

As I knew my ez link card would be expiring on 30 June, I went to check out a transitlink office. The person said I could only change my card after 30 June. Ok.
So I went to the control office at an MRT station, since there is no transitlink office at that particular station.
The person told me that I can only get a refund at any transitlink office on weekdays.
So in order to go to my destination, I had to buy a standard ticket.
Then at that MRT station, I decided to try my luck and asked the lady at the transitlink office.
She processed my request right away.
But thing is, I already bought a standard ticket for the return trip!
So I told myself, no sweat, u just refund it at the machine.
Oh my. who knows, I pressed wrongly and the machine only returned me my $1 deposit! my fare just got gobbled up by the machine.
Argh.
But at that time, I wasn't that that upset cuz I signed up for M1 broadband service.
Turn out it didn't work! the salesperson fooled me by saying WIN ME is supported.
I called up the technical side, which told me its not supported.
well well.

then I also failed my BTT! Lynette passed!
that is my fault cuz I didn't study.
Oh man. I shouldn't have slacked all day at home.
Ended up, I register to retake while Lynette register for FTT.
Haiz.

Another thing.
My phone's PC suite does not support WIN ME too.
Haiz. Must I upgrade to WIN XP???

Btw, I went for medical check up today. I almost lost my way and almost lost my receipt.

Really running into a bout of bad luck recently...

Back!!
From Changi Aloha!
The treasure hunt and games were super fun and a visit to the old changi hospital just next to our chalet ...arrh! but too bad it's a morning visit. so nothing much.
Best of all are the experience-sharing and dialogue session.
Not to forget the performances! a lot of Changi Village transvesite stuff which had everyone in stitches! LOL.
Let's strive to be a REAL Nichiren Shoshu believer!

//Yea! I completed my elementary 1 Japanese full time course!//

Haha. Let me “show off ” my limited knowledge. ( eh. ‘cause I’m a beginner, so correct me if I’ve made any mistakes =)

Nihongo:

Mai nichi, watashi wa gakkou e ikimasu.
Mai nichi, atashi no sensei wa kyoshitsu ni nemasu.
Watashi-tachi no nihongo o yomimasu ga omoshiro-kunai desu kara, watashi no sensei wa kikimasu to nemasu.
Kesa, ju-ji kara juichi-ji made shiken o torimasu.
Muzukashi-kunai desu.
Kin-youbi kara nichi-youbi made, watashi wa kenshu e ikimasu.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

English:

I go to school everyday.
My teacher sleeps in the classroom everyday.
As the Japanese we read is not interesting, my teacher listen and sleeps.
This morning, I took an exam from 10 to 11 am.
It was not difficult.
I go to camp from Friday to Sunday.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok. Enough of my broken Japanese, I got to pack now for my religion’s student kenshu tomorrow! =)

// returning to the “virtual world” //

As I looked at the title that I’ve gave to this entry, It seems like this blog has return to “life” from the “dead”. Haha.
Throughout all the blog entries, I have never discussed what this blog meant to me.
Perhaps because I have never thought of it.
In case anyone is wondering ( ß typing this is weird! ‘cause I’ve never imagine anyone to read my blog! ), today is just like another day. (I mean, not any anniversary or whatever that is regarding this blog )
Time passes without us knowing. But I believe, as I am sitting here and typing, I’m spending quality time unscrambling my thoughts.
To me, this blog is just like my life. Perhaps less mundane than life and contains many intangible things that we can’t see or feel in our usual, routinal lives.
Instead of recording cold, hard facts of what I’m doing at the point of my life as indicated by the date and time shown, the entries represent my inner spirit.
In my opinion, we often used too much of our brains alone.
Everytime I am blogging, I feel that my brain and inner spirit is connected.
My inner self dictating my dreams, hopes, thoughts and feelings.
However, once I return to the “real world”, the connection is lost and my brain tells me what to do.

Recently, I have been settling a lot of uni admission stuff.
That is secondary.
What is really difficult is choosing between the two course I am offered.
Arts and Social Science Vs Materials Engin
As different as the two are, to me, both are as appealing.
In the end, I chose the latter and only submitted at the eleventh hour ( both literally and figuratively! )
It was sort of a 45-55 sort of thing but I convinced myself to immerse in the school of thought that I should choose the course that I have some interest in and which will offer me relatively good career prospects.
I guess I should call myself a realist because I did not choose to pursue a course based solely on interest.
Actually, what is important is to be able to work hard in whatever you choose.
Thus, I’ve made a promise to myself not to return to my slack and pessimistic attitude.
Kambatte!
Then after submitting the application, I kept wondering whether I should appeal, esp nearing the deadlines.
But I did not. I am happy for what I’m given.

You are under considerable stress and you are almost about to 'blow your top' but you are fortunate enough to be able to exert control. Control is the name of the game and it is so good to realise that whatever the situation may be a this time - it will pass. You need to get away from everything for a while and if you do, you will find that, strangely enough, it will seem that most of your problems and situations will seem to wash away, just as the sea may wash away 'footprints' in the sand.You need an atmosphere of peace and quiet and you would like to share a bond of understanding with the 'right person' - you have the belief that with the right person, your stress and anxiety could be minimised.You feel tired - worn out and listless. The last thing that you want to do is to be in an open conflict with those around you that are forever tormenting you. What to do? That's the rub. You are feeling that you are being choked - unable to breathe.Setback after setback has resulted in considerable stress and now you have got to the stage where you are continuously on your guard, not only to protect yourself from others but to protect yourself from yourself. It would seem that many of your unfulfilled hopes and dreams have led to uncertainty and suspicion. You no longer wish to answer to others and you are insisting on freedom of thought. You feel that you are fully self-sufficient and can control your own destiny. You are seeking ways to protect yourself from further loss of prestige and against further setbacks. You have become very dependent and you doubt that matters could possibly get any better in the immediate future and this negative attitude is leading you to exaggerate your claims and to refuse reasonable compromise.You need to be needed and would like a situation where you will no longer be subjected to pressures and demands from those about you. There is no harm in 'dreaming' but it is you - and only you - that can be able to realise those dreams and to turn them into reality.

http://www.paulgoldin.com/colorgenics.htm

You Are the Middle Finger

A bit fragile and dependent on your friends, you're not nearly as hostile as you seem. You are balanced, easy to get along with, and quite serious. However, you can get angry and fed up with those around you. And you aren't afraid to show it! You get along well with: The Index Finger Stay away from: The Pinky

What Finger Are You?

oops dun mean to be vulgar=)

You Are 36% Paranoid Schizophrenic

You're pretty grounded, though you have your occasional paranoid moments. Just make sure to ignore those voices in your head!

Are You A Paranoid Schizophrenic?

You Are Internal - Realist - Empowered

You feel your life is controlled internally. If you want something, you make it happen. You don't wait around for things to go your way. You value your independence and don't like others to have control. You are a realist when it comes to luck. You don't attribute everything to luck, but you do know some things are random. You don't beat yourself up when bad things happen to you... But you do your best to try to make your own luck. You have a good deal of power, but you also know the pecking order. You realize that working the system does get you further. You know who to defer to and who to control. When it comes to the game of life, you play things flawlessly.

The Three Dimension Luck and Power Test

You Are 65% Tortured Genius

You are smart. Brilliant in fact. And while it's a blessing, it's also a curse. Your head is filled with everything - grand ideas, insufferable worries, and a good deal of angst.

Are You a Tortured Genius?

// making a difficult choice //

Got another letter.
Finally!
I mean, I thought ntu totally forgot about my application when virtually all the people around me had already got their application results last week.
Well, it was my dream course last time. Mat sci engin.
Yes last time…people like me fantasize a lot. And I mean A LOT.
I thought being in that course will allow me to do research on materials to make things for the benefit for mankind.
Then my parents pull me back to reality.
“oh you know my company’s QC (quality controller) ? she studied that during uni…are you sure you want to be like her?”
oh dear! I’ll be bored facing machines and goods, checking them in the same method forever.
Argh.
I have no idea.

Biz, accountancy, engin are courses that are so “concrete”…if you understand what I mean.
Having the expertise that can secure you a stable 5-day work week…but truth be told, it’s monotonous.
In fact, I think having such a job can allow people to enjoy a good lifestyle…
Probably live in a condo, driving a normal five-seater, shopping in the weekends, possessing at least one credit card, having the extra cash to splurge on tech gadgets…
Sometimes I really relish a life like that…very much seem like the life of every successful person.
But other times, I feel such a lifestyle paid too much attention to materialism and may even made us to be more self-centred than ever.

On the other hand, arts&social sci gives me an “ethereal”, an unreal feeling…
Firstly, I don’t even know what sort of career can I pursue…other than teaching.
It’s a lot about people skills so I reckon there will be management jobs…training people and stuff like that.
Perhaps analytical skills also. Collect and analyse data…uncovering new trends.
Maybe such jobs would have a lower level of monotony…
Though may not bring a stable income but can directly make a difference in other people’s lives.
But I’ve got to consider carefully ‘cause I’m not a social person.

Lol. All my current thoughts are all typed out…thus unscrambling the mind.
An emptied mind is conducive for sleeping =)

What Heng Hui Min Means

H is for Happy E is for Excellent N is for Nerdy G is for Glittering H is for Helpful U is for Unnatural I is for Intelligent M is for Mysterious I is for Innocent N is for Nerdy

What Does Your Name Mean?

lol. just for fun.

// j0BlesS//

yay. slacked for like 2 weeks.
super shuang.
but then there no income!
lol.

its time to fret about uni application.
I think Ntu forgotten about me.
Nus decided I wasn't engineer material. (pun unintended)
thus i was placed in FASS.
Oh. gosh. why?
if i choose to be in there, i'll need to fret alot.
Firstly, I am not suited for SEAsian studies or eng lit or hist or geog or social work or wadeva.
out of the 20 courses, I am only interested in 2. psychology and communications &new media.
argh. what if i can't get into the course i want?
secondly, even if i could get into the course i want, what if my grades can't allow me to proceed to do honours in final year?
thirdly, and most importantly, what can I do with such a degree in future?
in addition, my parents aren't too happy.
they want me to study accountancy/ biz but i defy their orders.
but now...perhaps i should appeal to do biz...but i don't want to stay in a 9-6 office job FOREVER!
my mum says i'm weird 'cause i don't want a office-bound job...oh by the way, she hopes I can work in a bank.
like her bro.
my dear uncle who always got free perks.
of course i should know. working in the bank always gets you perks and discounts, as i have found out during my brief stint at the worst, i mean, world's local bank.
discounts on cars, restaurants, jewellery, branded goods...
perks of free cakes, early bird bonus in investment plans.
ok. that did it.
I'm seriously considering to appeal to take biz.

// Sheryl Crow’s ideas to wipe out global warming- the ramblings//

Today I read the newspaper and saw this amusing piece of news.
Sheryl Crow is a great singer but that may not translate into being a great environmentalist.
But still, kudos for her efforts to think of these “easy” ways to save the Earth! =P

1) Limit each trip to the bathroom to one square piece of toilet paper

Well…this is a bit like intruding into our privacy. Anyway, how easy is it to make sure everyone really uses JUST 1 square of toilet paper? By the way, Sheryl definitely did not do any research. Some brands of toilet paper do not have squares!
Furthermore, I really do not think this method will help save trees because toilet paper is actually a recycled product and not directly produced from trees.
A better idea is to ration toilet papers. Then again, the price would go up and that may give tree-cutters more incentive to cut trees.

2) Don’t use paper napkins, instead, use your sleeves

Ooh…does preserving nature means that we sacrifice our hygiene?
As the preacher of such an act, let’s just wait and see if Sheryl Crow can eat her pasta and make a big, red tomato sauce mark on her US$5000 Gucci dress(provided the dress has sleeves) while dining with an US president wannabe , discussing ideas about his latest book “An Inevitable Truth”. I’m sure a few pages will be devoted to how, as human beings(celebrity or not), we have a secret desire to wipe our mouths on our sleeves after a meal. Then all of us shall celebrate.
And, who knows? It may become the latest “red” carpet fashion in Hollywood.

3) A TV reality show in which the winner would be the contestant who lives the most environmentally friendly life. The prize would be a recording contract.

Well, this is even easier than American Idol! Let’s cross our fingers that Sanjaya would not take part if Sheryl’s dream became reality. Plus, I’m worried about the fate of American Idol…this reality show may just surpass AI in terms of popularity.
Apparently she got a misconception that environment-friendly people could sing and vice versa.

Anyway, from the above, I hope we don’t get a misconception that singers are environment-friendly.

//work-fatigue//

Recently I have been suffering from work fatigue.
Its that kind of no-matter-how-much-u-pay-me-I-also-dun-want-to-work kind of attitude.
Its that terrible.
But then again my pay is really just average.
Truly speaking, next time when I have to work, I wont really mind lower pay or longer travelling time as long as I'm happy with the job.
Else I will job-HOP!
Just got to say i'm lucky that this is just a temp. thing...BEST of all, it is ENDING
I know I have been complaining ALOT abt this job so I wont add the details here.
And I've been reading "Digital Fortress"!
The story is so intriguing which makes me feel like working as a code-breaker! Cool :)

//contemplating the meaning of death//

Sometime between late tues night and the wee hours of wed morning, my first uncle breathed his last.
Warmth left his body, never to return.
The only thing that was ailing him was a stomachache that dragged unexpectedly over the past few days.
When my mum told me the news, I thought she was joking, until I saw her red, swollen eyes.
Oh? I had no hint of sadness, no emotion at all.
Strangely.
My thoughts went back to CNY when I last saw him hale and healthy.
My uncle was an authoritative and well-respected figure in the family…something like a da ge da.
His siblings could always approach him with their problems and he would do his best to help.
Can I imagine how he would look like when he's dead?
No way.
It was an unacceptable fact that he passed away suddenly.

7 years ago, I saw my grandpa on his coffin.
dead or not.
It's just a matter of difference over the appearance.
someone had said that a dead person looks like he is just sleeping
but many of us would beg to differ.
my grandpa usually wore white singlets and black shorts.
but in death, he was clad in yellow silk, decorated with threaded dragons.
his nose looked unusual.
not to mention the make-up.
any traditional men would not have any make-up on at any usual day.
so i wonder how different my uncle would look like from his normal self.
Sadly, in death, no one can have any control over their appearance, or in fact, over everything.
Maybe that is why many people feel death is frightening.

//self-introspection//

Ok. After all the complaints, I’m staying on for the time being.
Actually I’ve already fulfilled my one week’s notice.
But people keep encouraging me to stay so I succumbed (typical of me)
Anyway, I shall take on life’s challenges as it comes.
Resigning is simply a way of escaping.
Sadly, that’s what I’m skilled at.
Escaping when there are problems.
Deep down, I know that some of the stress actually come from myself.
Whenever the environment doesn’t support me, I’ll feel stressed.
Whenever other people feel stressed, I do too.
Is that empathy or just plainly indicates that I’m a weakling?
Even if I hate to admit.
Strong people aren’t affected by the environment.
Strong people stand confident in the face of adversity.
I’m the exact opposite.
Succumbing to the environment and crumbling to adversity.
I know I shouldn’t stay like this.
But taking the first step to change and to continue with it is an absolutely daunting task.

//pricked by conscience//

Feeling extremely guilty.
It was 1745 already but one of the snack girls still asked me to submit a cv.
No choice.
I got to seek help from HER again.
I have yet to know her name but she has helped me without complains for many times.
How many times have I handed in late to her and she still give me a thumbs-up sign?
If it were other people, they would have rejected me and put me in a difficult position.
Or even scolded me.
But it’s not my fault!
Who ask them to give it to me late?
What more can I do??

Your Famous Last Words Will Be:

"What we know is not much. What we don't know is enormous."

What Will Your Famous Last Words Be?

Your Job Dissatisfaction Level is 53%

Well, you don't have the worst job in the world, but it's not great. And don't worry, you're not the problem - your company is. Start looking around for another job, even if you're not totally fed up. Because in time, you're going to be dying to quit!

Should You Quit Your Job?

Your Life Is Worth...

$882,500

How Much Is Your Life Worth?

Your Personality is Very Rare (INTP)

Your personality type is goofy, imaginative, relaxed, and brilliant. Only about 4% of all people have your personality, including 2% of all women and 6% of all men You are Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

Your Learning Style: Curious and Brilliant

You are a very abstract learner. You can grasp even the most complex theories. You Should Study: Astronomy Biology Chemistry Computer Science Linguistics Mathematics Philosophy Physics Psychology

What Should You Study?

Your Personality Cluster is Introverted Thinking

You are: Objective, honest, and credible Intellectually curious, with many diverse interests More inclined toward ideas than people Fiercely independent and unapologetically unconventional

What's Your Personality Cluster?

//A typical day at the worst local ban--part 1//

"Help! Stop adding!" I yelled, my voice fading as my arms were crushing under the weight of leather products the snack girls had bought.
"Wei Min, could you please help me photocopie these leatherrss?" animalmanure was saying.
"Sure!" I replied, in a half-hearted to fake a smile.
In actual fact, what was going through my mind was, "Wa lao eh? How to photocopie, I mean, photocopy leathers?"
My heart sank. The first task given to me was bound to be a faliure.

"Wei Min? Are you listening?" The lightly-accent voice interrupted my thoughts.
"Oh..oh yes" I assured animalmanure, at the same time relieved that I was holding letters, not leathers.

Letters from Iwo Jima

Initially interested in this movie because of a history lesson

when I was in sec 4.

The words "Iwo Jima" was kept in my mind till now.

I could never forget the gleam in his eyes and the excitement in his voice as my teacher related the story of the battle of Iwo Jima.

But still it cannot be compared to watching the "reel" action on the big screen!

This movie speaks of loyalty, fate, humanity, fear and the vulnerability of human beings in the dark times of war.

haha. gosh. i'm so nervous right now. 2.30pm. right.

" Enjoy what is there to enjoy.

Suffer what is there to suffer.

Treat both enjoyment and sufferings as facts of life."

//newfound freedom//


Finally I quitted my job!
Time for a BREAK!
After all, it’s been a good three months working…
So I guess it’s a normal thing to miss the workplace and the seniors?
I think, after these three months of slogging, I sort of got used to the routine.
So now to break away from that kind of lifestyle just rendered me bored.
Which means only one thing.
It’s time to get another job!


Lately, I’ve been incoherent in my entries.
Look at the first paragraph.
The first sentence and second sentence sort of contradicted each other.
It’s like this when your mind is confused.
It’s like this when your life is in your own control.
For the past 17-odd years you have been controlled in many ways.
Be it your parents, your friends, your teachers.
But now, the present me…maybe I should say, ever since ‘A’ level exams ended, everyone else had minimal control over my life.
Over how I spend my time.
Over what I wear, what I eat, drink.
Everyday.
All of these were decisions made by myself.


Even to quit the job.
It’s solely my own decision.
But there may regrets.


Now, I totally understand the difficulty in making decisions when facing uncertainties.

//reminiscing the past//

hey! back from Malaysia!
actually my family and I haven’t been going there for CNY for a few years.
so you can say that it was fun returning to the crowd and noise.
however it cannot be compared to the past.
when my cousins and us were kids.
when we used to play hide-and-seek.
when we used to gobble sweets and cookies.
when we used to play fireworks
when we used to greet people in chorus.

sadly, dunno since when… all of us seemed to drift apart.
all of them busy with their innumerable friends.
until I hardly see them around!

// a blank mind. inspiration-less. //

how ah how?
recently there's been no inspiration to blog.
and it doesn't help that I've been facing the computer for too long at work.
so much so that i've been hesitant in using the com at home.
just realised that i haven't been using my brain nowadays.
at work, it's just type-type-type, click-click-click.
at home, sad to say, i've fallen prey to indulging in mindless tv programmes.
this just can't go on.

today the ntu talks sort of awaken me.
made me remember that i'm still waiting for A levels results.
still a long stretch to go before going into the workforce.
if my results can make it, i'll be going to the uni.
if i'm going to a uni, i will devote all my energy into studies.
yes. even though it's a wee bit late, this will be my new year resolution.
perhaps should make it CNY resolution, then it wouldn't be too late.
haha.

and, i really look forward to English lessons with my tutee!
seriously i think i'm really a lenient teacher.
usually, it's either me who burst out laughing or the "ah-boy" who can't stop giggling at his own mistakes.
last week, "ah-boy" hand in to me a newspaper article which he cut.
i don't know whether i should laugh or cry.
cute as he is, he cut me this article, "Thailand is still a land of smiles"
it was a report on how the Thai people were not angry at Singapore even though the Lions beat them to clinch the ASEAN football championship.
although "ah-boy" fulfilled the minimum 8 sentences criteria I set him, all he wrote was about the top scorer, Alarm Sham (er, his spelling is atrocious =P, should be Nor Alam Shah, if I’m not wrong), as well as the fact that his dad predicted wrongly that the thais would triumph.
The funny thing is that although it is so irrelevant, i can't fault him for anything as the article was not from the SPORTS section, but from the front page of ST.

//food is getting more taste//

two weeks into the new year passed like blur.
practically gobble, chew and swallow.
so unhealthy!
but it's better now...haha...that's why the food now have more taste, even though they are from the same old stalls that i frequent.
that's because there's more time to savour the food.

just that i'm now able to chew more should i bite more? (not literally =)
hmm..
there are currently 3 things on hand.
1. student i/c in sk chapter.(religion)
2. full time admin work
3. tuition on certain weekday nights

thinking of taking up jap but that will be later...

as for now...a bit sick of the working environment already.
sick of travelling the same route to work and same route back.
sick of the food there (though delicious)
i think i need a change.

so i asked my dad how is he able to stay put at the same company for so long
he says
yes. all the above are true.
but when u travel on the same route to and fro everyday, you pass by different people.
when u eat at the same old stalls, you share tables with different people.
when u type the same old stuff at work, you impact different lives.
when u answer the company phone using the same old lines, u are talking to different people.

yes. i got it.
disguised as boring, life is actually an unpredictable experience.
cherish every moment.

//weather is turning better-for the moment//

Class bbq was good.
Everything was organised and no dilly-dally-ing
Haha...and food was edible and nice.
No regrets that I went =)
Topics of the day were finding jobs and driving tests...
Wow...what a change from last time...
No one talked about A levels, Uni, faculties...
I wonder if a change of environment and going into separate paths has made us cherish other people more

//blessings from the weather//

23-25 Dec: Student Kenshu(camp)
An experience like never before.
"Thrown face"countless times during that short 3 days.
But maybe that is not a bad thing after all.
We can learn from our mistakes so as to handle the same situation better next time.
Hmm..all those mistakes made are attributed to the lack of preparation on our part.
That's why the group cheers are so sian that nobody in our group felt like cheering while other groups' cheers seemed so special and unique.
That’s why I stuttered in front of so many people during the intro to our group performance on fun night. (btw, I got the script only about half hour before our group's turn)
That’s why I fell down on the muddy grass as I was turning round and round, with my head on the stick during the "survivor" game.

Tired…super tired…slept only 3-4 hours each day of the camp
But it's nice to know some Malaysian student believers better =P
Though sleeping time was sacrificed.
By the end of the last day, I was so tired that I couldn't feel reality.
People around me seemed so unreal…like I’m in a dream.
Scary right?
But I really tried not to doze off during Buddhist lectures.
Well…learnt quite a lot.

Compassion is to help people that you know to make the right judgment and not to pretend that you never see anything when people do something wrong.

Among the many paths of life, which should we take?
Buried in the many troubles in life, what should we do?
Nobody can give anyone a satisfying answer.
Instead of praying for good grades and getting what you want, we should actually pray sincerely for the wisdom, strength and willpower to overcome the difficulties in life and find the path that will really suit us.


Work is getting less stressful everyday…
I guess once you get the hang of it, you won't keep thinking of slacking at home.
However the down side is that, you have less time for TV, blogging, contacting friends, replying people etc…
Everyday, joining the morning rush really makes me feel at least 6 years older.
Like I’m working permanently…for people working in the same company, doing the same old thing forever…how can they managed it?
Work is so boring that I think I will keep job-hopping when it's time for me to join the morning rush permanently.
Well…I guess excitement comes when you see people when you least expect it.
Like mr potato chua chatting in Chinese over lunch with a lady at the food centre you frequent during lunch.

Or the elderly man who calls himself "national treasure" in the video you watched on the eve of national day in school. (The multi-tasking busker wearing clogs, juggling florescent green tennis balls and blowing a harmonica, all at the same time….And I almost banged into him! For his superb entertainment, he earned my $1 = )

Or when you were thinking " why is this person wearing shades indoors?" Then, your jaw dropped when you realise it is Fiona Xie smiling and walking into the office like a common person.

//bit of rain//

haha. see see! I also got my own virtual pet!
Feed haro with bamboo, thanks!
There is just too much to blog about, from attending my cousin's wedding in malaysia to my job.
But i've been too busy and lazy =X

Just like i've said, our camping group is just going to fall to pieces.
I can't co-operate with my co-leader because he is too arrogant and nonsensical.
Two members already dropped out.
The mentors talked to us today and I had to wait 1hr plus at the mrt station after my work for them to arrive.
Then they just beat around the bush without pinpointing anything.
Why must people be afraid to say what is wrong?

The trip to malaysia was a nice break even though I had to take 4 days' no-pay leave.
I was one of the "jie mei" accompanying the bride, since my cousin did not have any bridesmaid.
It was easy, and I earned a hongbao in ringgit. Basically just follow the bride everywhere.
At the banquet, food was not bad, but when can they ever stop engaging karaoke singers to entertain us?
It seem to be a trend there.
I have nothing against it just that someday, it'll just break someone's eardrums and render him/her deaf.
The next day, it off to A'famosa, a short route from malacca's city centre.
My uncle got free "bungalow" chalets for a night and cowboy town tickets.
Next morning it's shopping at malacca city centre.
The road was too bumpy and my aunt vomitted at the roadside halfway...well i definitely agree! Sitting in a car makes me feel like i'm on some roller coaster.
Then, my sis was looking for a pair of shoes.
Strangely, all the shops sell the same few designs at practically the same price.
What do they earn???


Ok, though my work is oh-so-boring because i practically key in ticketing numbers, costs and customer details by the same procedures everyday, still look forward to it lah.
Or else just stay home and slack is so bo-liao.
Some more no money to spend.
Actually i'm just looking forward to my first pay cheque. haha.
Now I also take calls, give forms to people who come in for interviews, photocopy stuff, and find invoices and send it to other departments.
At least can walk around so my back does not ache.
In the morning, I look forward to lunch break.
After lunch, I look forward to tea break.
So nice...all those airlines send cakes to us...or boss lady will buy something =)
Wonder how long I can last in this company.....
After tea break, I look forward to going home.
Shower.
Dinner.
Tv.
Watch Doha games or online.
Sleep.

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	6.7
Mind:	6.9
Body:	8.4
Spirit:	7.5
Friends/Family:	3.5
Love:	0
Finance:	5.5
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Your Life Analysis:

Life: Your life rating is a score of the sum total of your life, and accounts for how satisfied, successful, balanced, capable, valuable, and happy you are. The quiz attempts to put a number on the summation of all of these things, based on your answers. Your life score leaves room for improvement. (I'll be a saint if I have a perfect life) You can make changes to improve your trouble areas, and this will bring you greater satisfaction. Focus on your weakest points and set about to change them. Do not delay your happiness and success.

Mind: Your mind rating is a score of your mind's clarity, ability, and health. Higher scores indicate an advancement in knowledge, clear and capable thinking, high mental health, and pure thought free of interference. Your mind score is not bad, but could be improved upon. Your mental health is not weak, but you are not achieving full mental clarity and function. Learn how to unclutter your mind. Keep learning, keep improving, continue moving forward.

Body: Your body rating measures your body's health, fitness, and general wellness. A healthy body contributes to a happy life, however many of us are lacking in this area. You have an excellent body score, which means you are incredibly focused on maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Continue in that focus, and your body will remain healthy and strong.

Spirit: Your spirit rating seeks to capture in a number that elusive quality which is found in your faith, your attitude, and your philosophy on life. A higher score indicates a greater sense of inner peace and balance. Your spirit score is relatively high, which means you are rewarded by your beliefs. Spirituality is clearly important to do. Never let it slip, and continue to learn and grow.

Friends/Family: Your friends and family rating measures your relationships with those around you, and is based on how large, healthy, and dependable your social network is. Your friends and family score suffers, yet it does not need to be this way. ( I think it's perfectly fine) Strengthen your social network by reaffirming old bonds. Seek out new friendships, and they will provide you the reward you need. Try using MeetUp.com to find people near you who share your interests.

Love: Your love rating is a measure of your current romantic situation. Sharing your heart with another person is one of life's most glorious, terrifying, rewarding experiences. Your love score is very low, indicating trouble. There is love out there for you. Seek the advice of wise people on how to go about finding it. Do not lose hope. (well, thanks, but I haven't)

Finance: Your finance rating is a score that rates your current financial health and stability. Your finances are somewhat in the middle, neither bad or exceptional. Keep doing what works for you, and improve what doesn't. Focus on long-term financial stability as your goal.(Ah, yes, I need more cash)

This is my 97th post... Yippie! I'll reach 100 before the year ends!

// why does the weather keep changing? //

wow... just realised I haven't blogged for nearly a month.
well, about nearly a month ago, I thought I couldn't live without the Internet, but after all the self-psycho-ing (er, u get what I mean) I managed to abandon the habit for almost a month. The work of willpower.
At the same time, I deserted my handphone at the most unnoticeable place and only checked it twice daily.
Erm...so habits die hard and I may appeared to be "missing in action" even after the A levels.
Sigh. So I shall cross my fingers and hope that all that I did was worth it.

It seems like after the As, everything came charging at me.
Firstly came the expected, tidying the mess I created during the exams.
It is just a surprise that mum did not scold me. haha.
She simply said: "Tidy your stuff, no need to pack them in the store room, you'll never know when you might need them" (Oh-oh..is that a bad omen)

Then, for Saturday and Sunday, I went to the Propagation Centre to attend student and youth meetings. (FYI : the PC is the place my family and I go for religious teachings and practice) haha. so hardworking right.
I'm supposed to lead a group of about 25 students to the camp in Dec.
Sigh. Sherlyn doesn't know me well. If she had, she wouldn't put my name down.
Anyone seen me lead before? No right? I'm dead.

Ok... as for now, I'm busy looking for a holiday job, will-be busy with the camp stuff, looking forward to my new specs, looking for good books to read, and...back to blogging. (back to life =)