// life can only get more difficult //
oh why, every year in uni seems to be challenging my limits and tolerance.
everytime i think something is tough, another even tougher task would emerge.
i always think that ultimately someday, there will come a time when i can't take it anymore.
it's a struggle to keep awake during lectures.
understanding what's being taught is taking a toil on me.
planning ahead for fyp and fulfilling it is driving me crazy.
i spent 80% effort and yet the yield is just 20%.
a math qn: how much effort do i need to put in to achieve 100% yield?
today i just told a friend why a teacher would be my last choice of career.
after tutoring for so many years, there is just no job satisfaction.
all my tutees want is a pass.
don't they realise that the bar has been raised?
it is no longer sufficient to just scrape through.
judging by her grades, i have a hunch that she wouldn't make it pass N levels.
sometimes i'm just simply amazed by her laidback attitude and self-confidence.
i'm just very disappointed by her prelim results.
failed all her subjects yet she has got the cheek to play her itouch before tutition starts.
To make it to sec 5, the average grade she needs to achieve is a B3 or B4.
i doubt even a miracle can save her.
4 years of my time and efforts going to waste.
i am not cut out to be a teacher, no matter how hard i try.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
//人生不如意的事，十有八九。只有如意的事值得记住//
recent encounters with people makes me wonder if i'm prone to misinterpreting people's words.
either that or they are the ones who conveniently forgot what they have told me, and as a result, changed their initial thinking, which i had remembered.
on a whiny mode, i can't believe within 2 weeks of school reopening, bad luck has already surrounded my very existence.
of course, i'm still very grateful that nothing seriously bad really happened,
but sometimes, little things that goes wrong adds up and you're left wondering why these 'little things' that others didn't have to bother, bogs you down.
it seems like lady luck hasn't stop frowning at me since the beginning of the year.
I actually have half-a-mind to document all those bad experiences but I've decided to try to let go of the negative (after all, they are little things) and remember the positive ones.
Of course, i didn't react well at first when those bad news were related to me, but that's normal i guess.
And I really don't care if people think I'm silly to enrol in major prescribed electives that result in having four consecutive days of exams. Or that I'm taking 22 AUS (thanks to my psych module)
Other are driven by practicality (an essential of engineering); myself, by passion.
recent encounters with people makes me wonder if i'm prone to misinterpreting people's words.
either that or they are the ones who conveniently forgot what they have told me, and as a result, changed their initial thinking, which i had remembered.
on a whiny mode, i can't believe within 2 weeks of school reopening, bad luck has already surrounded my very existence.
of course, i'm still very grateful that nothing seriously bad really happened,
but sometimes, little things that goes wrong adds up and you're left wondering why these 'little things' that others didn't have to bother, bogs you down.
it seems like lady luck hasn't stop frowning at me since the beginning of the year.
I actually have half-a-mind to document all those bad experiences but I've decided to try to let go of the negative (after all, they are little things) and remember the positive ones.
Of course, i didn't react well at first when those bad news were related to me, but that's normal i guess.
And I really don't care if people think I'm silly to enrol in major prescribed electives that result in having four consecutive days of exams. Or that I'm taking 22 AUS (thanks to my psych module)
Other are driven by practicality (an essential of engineering); myself, by passion.
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
//horrible year 4//
why does every sem becomes tougher than the previous?
Looks like I CAN'T SLACK ANYMORE.
Having slack for the past weekend, i have to pay back double this week.
Mind you, it's only week 2.
And I kept running late.
and running all over North spine, trying to figure out where's my class.
just like freshmen.
partially because i haven't been in school for nearly 9 months.
as usual, how i wish i live right in boon lay.
travelling is super energy draining. and time wasting.
as year 4, we could choose our major prescribed electives,
needless to say, many people chose according to the best exam dates.
that's to say, they avoid consecutive exam dates.
what about me?
well, i'm more idealistic than practical, so i chose according to my 'interest'
or you could say, by elimination.
Eliminating those i have absolutely no interest in.
So, what is the result?
Very unfortunately, I am bombarded with 4 consecutive days of exams.
yes, FOUR.
some of my coursemates have none.
of course, many say i'm heading for four days of hell, which i totally agree.
on the same note,
even though i have 4-day week, my timetable is packed.
even though i did plan for breaks, in actual fact, for most days i didn't have lunch until late afternoon.
why? i myself am not sure.
there's just too many fyp stuff to settle.
argh.
therein lies the benefit of starting fyp earlier.
however, i do not regret, because my IA experience has made me see things from a different perspective.
And I finally know where I'm heading to.
I have found motivation, what I need now, is discipline.
Like a little bird flying to a destination far away.
Without nutrients and water from the cage, which it has gotten used to.
Can it survive the arduous journey and emerge victorious?
why does every sem becomes tougher than the previous?
Looks like I CAN'T SLACK ANYMORE.
Having slack for the past weekend, i have to pay back double this week.
Mind you, it's only week 2.
And I kept running late.
and running all over North spine, trying to figure out where's my class.
just like freshmen.
partially because i haven't been in school for nearly 9 months.
as usual, how i wish i live right in boon lay.
travelling is super energy draining. and time wasting.
as year 4, we could choose our major prescribed electives,
needless to say, many people chose according to the best exam dates.
that's to say, they avoid consecutive exam dates.
what about me?
well, i'm more idealistic than practical, so i chose according to my 'interest'
or you could say, by elimination.
Eliminating those i have absolutely no interest in.
So, what is the result?
Very unfortunately, I am bombarded with 4 consecutive days of exams.
yes, FOUR.
some of my coursemates have none.
of course, many say i'm heading for four days of hell, which i totally agree.
on the same note,
even though i have 4-day week, my timetable is packed.
even though i did plan for breaks, in actual fact, for most days i didn't have lunch until late afternoon.
why? i myself am not sure.
there's just too many fyp stuff to settle.
argh.
therein lies the benefit of starting fyp earlier.
however, i do not regret, because my IA experience has made me see things from a different perspective.
And I finally know where I'm heading to.
I have found motivation, what I need now, is discipline.
Like a little bird flying to a destination far away.
Without nutrients and water from the cage, which it has gotten used to.
Can it survive the arduous journey and emerge victorious?
Thursday, September 02, 2010
// Hurray to changes in education system //
I think it's very logical for to introduce the so-called 'through-train' programme to N level students.
All along, I've always thought that it is rather unfair for students in N(A) stream to undergo 2 national exams consecutively.
Students in the express stream are said to be stressed out by the O levels and teachers pressured by the need to finish the syllabus, so much so that it suppressed students' curiosity and fascination on a particular subject. Hence, the through-train programme was introduced.
What about N(A) stream students? I really thought they suffered a worse fate.
The through-train programme for N(A) students might sort of remove the stigma that these students are less capable than express students, hence parents might become more willing to send their children to N(A) stream if their PSLE grades are the in-betweens.
However, the pressure of students might not be totally gone, wouldn't the parents want their children to enter this programme in order to secure a place in poly, and finally uni?
As for the IP for express students, I wonder why there is a need for a JC to specify the feeder secondary schools.
Isn't that akin to segregating the student population?
Perhaps some schools, for eg VS IP students going to VJC seems reasonable.
But specifying some other non-affliated, non-related school to a JC seems to me, a signal telling the students, hey our IP students goes there, so if even if you're not, after your O levels, you should be heading to that JC too.
But of course, even without such 'obvious' differentiation in the non-IP era, many students of a secondary school would also flock to the same one or two JC, either due to similar culture or vicinity.
Sigh. The race to the top is never-ending.
I think it's very logical for to introduce the so-called 'through-train' programme to N level students.
All along, I've always thought that it is rather unfair for students in N(A) stream to undergo 2 national exams consecutively.
Students in the express stream are said to be stressed out by the O levels and teachers pressured by the need to finish the syllabus, so much so that it suppressed students' curiosity and fascination on a particular subject. Hence, the through-train programme was introduced.
What about N(A) stream students? I really thought they suffered a worse fate.
The through-train programme for N(A) students might sort of remove the stigma that these students are less capable than express students, hence parents might become more willing to send their children to N(A) stream if their PSLE grades are the in-betweens.
However, the pressure of students might not be totally gone, wouldn't the parents want their children to enter this programme in order to secure a place in poly, and finally uni?
As for the IP for express students, I wonder why there is a need for a JC to specify the feeder secondary schools.
Isn't that akin to segregating the student population?
Perhaps some schools, for eg VS IP students going to VJC seems reasonable.
But specifying some other non-affliated, non-related school to a JC seems to me, a signal telling the students, hey our IP students goes there, so if even if you're not, after your O levels, you should be heading to that JC too.
But of course, even without such 'obvious' differentiation in the non-IP era, many students of a secondary school would also flock to the same one or two JC, either due to similar culture or vicinity.
Sigh. The race to the top is never-ending.
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